Everything we do in life comes with both benefits and struggles. What difficulties have you faced with homeschooling and how did you resolve it?

 

 I would say that homeschooling high school has been the hardest.   In order to resolve it, I have bought more expensive curriculum that does the teaching for me.  I'm still a bit unsure of the outcome.  I'm now considering sending out son to Sylvan for SAT prep.  I could do this at home, but at this point, I really want him to start learning to be accountable to other people for instruction.  He is 16 and I now know very little in his opinion. 

 I've been thinking about this several days before posting and of all the struggles I've had with the kids over the years, my biggest problem has been my own feelings of doing my kids a disservice.  If a child comes out of school not being able to read or not knowing thier times tables, you can blame the teacher, the school district, the curriculum, the number of kids in the class, and so on and so on...  If they come out of homeschool that way - only one person gets blamed, lol, ME!  I don't feel I handle confrontation or blame very well and am quick to take on blame myself to the point it can debilitate any future efforts.  And then there's friends and family scrutinizing your every move, especially at the beginning.  I 'overcame' it (if indeed I have completely) by, 1) Listening to my dh, for whom there's no gray area in anything and basically said, "heck with what everyone thinks, we're doing this and not going back..." and 2) By finally seeing and hearing some successes.  My two largest nay-sayers, a sister and my mil both within the last few years came to us and said how wrong they had been in thinking our kids would be dumb, not fit in with society and that we simply would not not succeed with this.  By the time they shared that with us, we had been hsing many years (I think our ds had graduated by then, in fact) and fortunately or unfortunately, I no longer needed to hear it.  And I told them so, lol, that I wished they could have been more positive thru the years rather than waiting 'til the job was done before supporting us in any way.

As far as academics were/are concerned, in the very beginning, I worried a lot about what our oldest two would do after completing their work in the morning.  They were used to their entire school day being filled and regimented and as much as I wanted to homeschool, I wanted to be finished with them by noon and have some time to do housework, run errands, plan dinner, spend time with the baby, etc. But both of them eventually found hobbies that filled their time and were quite happy to have unscheduled chunks of the day to do what they wished - or do nothing at all.  Funny, it's our youngest that doesn't entertain herself well and watches the clock to see when she can start calling her public-schooled friends and cook something up...

I despaired when the high school years came along, too - our area has a reputation for not wanting to accept any h/school credits, flat-out telling one family that since their dd was 16 when they wanted to put her in school, tha they didn't have to accept the credits or even the dd and would make her take whatever classes they wanted her to take (the story had a happy ending, she went back home and finished her education there, went on to grad college and is a beautiful and well-educated young bride, working in the legal dept. of the Federal Court system - the parents told the school to, well, you fill in the blank...).  So I knew there was no going back and I had to make the high school years work.  Long story short, we enrolled them in an umbrella school as they reached high school age (I felt I needed a third-party setting requirements and awaiting assignments, much like ladyofthehouse) and in many ways, high school became easier than elementary and junior high, as they were well able to fulfill the assignments with little help from me - I mostly became a resource for resources, the assignment lady and their occasional tutor.  Again, with our youngest, I'm still very involved with her learning as she resists doing a lot on her own.  The weaning process is taking much longer with this one, and alas, I am old and tired...

Hope I haven't written too much of a book here, but I wanted share that most feelings of inadequacy are (usually) unfounded, tho you may not see the big picture 'til many years down the road.  Just keep your eye on the prize and keep plugging away - it will come to a (mostly!) happy end someday.

Thanks for the thought-provoking post, Brandy, and don't forget to let us know your own experience(s) with struggles...Liz 

 

Oh, I will be weighing in Liz. With the weather issues here lately, I am more posting quick comments and dashing off unexpectedly. I need a little time to consider my experiences and how I want to share them then type them.

 
 

 

 

 

You couldn't have said this any better TizzyLizzy.  And now that I read it, I must completely agree with you.  Taking on the responsibility for my sons educations was a huge and frightening endeavor.  When I'm asked about hsing, I am quick to say that I'm sure my kids haven't gotten the best education, but they haven't gotten the worst either.  I have liked the umbrella school to help with those concerns.  At least I know that we are covering the bases.  Another thing that has really helped me is keeping a log book.  This is a requirement for the program we use, and I'm so glad I've had it to review.  Homeschooling quickly becomes a way of life instead of just doing school at home.  Because it didn't always feel like school to me,  I would sometimes forget all the things we were accomplishing.  Occasionally I would be attacked by doubt.  I would be certain that I'd ruined the poor children and they were sure to come out ne're-do-wells, and it would be ALL MY FAULT!!  Sitting down with the log book and seeing all that we had accomplished really helped quench that anxiety for me. 

 Pat, I have always kept our logbook each year, too.  I recently had to dig out ds's high school assignment book (and he's 25 now!) because I couldn't remember the name of the Spanish course that he had used and done well with.  And after reading thru the book for that year, I impressed myself, lol!  Like you said, we had done lots of really neat stuff I had forgotten all about.  I had even written down a note on the calendar when he'd gone fishing with a friend, that he'd sung a special at church one week, and that he'd taken archery lessons each Monday that fall...  So it encouraged me again to write down everything dd does now, even if it seems trivial - it'll be a nice reminder later and looks good on paper in case our school is ever questioned.

Do you just use a plain journal or a boughten one?  I really like Home Schooler's Journal, but for the last couple years I've used CLASS' Lesson Planner as a friend gives them to me free each year.  Either one has plenty of space, tho the HSJ is a little easier to manage with the spiral, 'lay-flat' binding.  I see Christian Light has a new one out, but it's a little pricey, around $12.00.

LOL, I like your response about your ds's education, "it's not the worst..." - I usually qualify my, "We homeschool" statement with, "...but it doesn't work for everybody!"  Sounds lame, I know, but it gives people that want one an out...Liz

 

TizzyLizzy:

Do you just use a plain journal or a boughten one?  I really like Home Schooler's Journal, but for the last couple years I've used CLASS' Lesson Planner as a friend gives them to me free each year.  Either one has plenty of space, tho the HSJ is a little easier to manage with the spiral, 'lay-flat' binding.  I see Christian Light has a new one out, but it's a little pricey, around $12.00.

LOL, I like your response about your ds's education, "it's not the worst..." - I usually qualify my, "We homeschool" statement with, "...but it doesn't work for everybody!"  Sounds lame, I know, but it gives people that want one an out...Liz

Liz  -  I use the log book published by North Atlantic Regional Schools, who we work through.  It was made specifically for their program, so it works nicely for keeping track of hours and accumulating them on the bottom of the sheet.  It is pricey for a log book, so I actually made my own on the computer a couple of years ago.  I decided that not having the spiral to lay it flat was not worth the savings in the long run.  

You're right, homeschooling is not for everyone.  It is also so different than regular school in so many ways, that it can be hard to compare the two of them. We had dinner with friends yesterday and I mentioned that we were going to do a class starting this fall with a focus on note taking/hightlighting and study skills in order to prepare for college.  When she looked at me strangely, I realized I had just said this to a "public school mom" and hoped it didn't sound silly to her.  She exclaimed that she thought that was a fantastic idea because her son is heading to college in a month totally ill-prepared to take notes.   I was relieved!

I am new to homeschooling starting this coming fall (for my 6th grader and kindergarten) although I have started some informal instruction.  WEll, my biggest struggle is my toddler!! He needs a lot of attention and I haven't found a way to deal with him while I practice reading with my oldest.  My oldest needs a lot of help with reading.  WE are moving to a big house which will have plenty of room for homeschooling and projects.  I'm afraid my toddler will get in trouble if I don't watch him while I teach but at the same time I feel he will be disruptive if he is around. 

Please give me ideas.  Waiting for my husband to come home so I can do some schooling is not an option.  I even thought of a babysitter but he already goes to a sitter for a couple of hours a week so I can run errands.

Please help!

Carmina

This is probably an off-the-wall comment, as I am without children, but it seems to me that your toddler just may be jealous of his big sib, who gets your attention.  MAYBE, if you gave the toddler a stack of picture books, & after he finishes a book, attend to him for a few minutes to find out what he liked in teh book, maybe even read to him the last page or so before asking, he might be a lot happier & less disruptive.  JMHO.

Very true, Deb.  He will soon learn he has to share mom, but it's a tough lesson to learn!

Carmina, my toddler is now 16, lol, but I remember a few things that may help you - you will get a lot of tips, I'll bet, that you'll be able to use.

The first obvious choice is to do reading with your older boy during your little one's nap time.  All the books say that you must rest when baby rests, but let's just get this out of the way now - I suspect your days of rest have been over for awhile, and when you begin hsing, it's pretty much in the permanent past, lol.  Even when my small kids were no longer taking actual naps during the day, I insisted that they had a quiet time in their room for an hour or so each day.  They could read or play quietly, but I enforced the down time, for me as much as them.  That may free up a block of teaching time.

Can he/she (sorry, can't remember about your 3 y/o) watch a DVD or an educational show for perhaps 30 minutes that would give you time with your student?  You could start out sitting in the living room, too,if necessary, and teach there 'til it's clear that mom needs some time with just the 6th grader.

How about his/her own 'schoolbooks'?  Something only brought out during class time.  Sam's or Walmart has workbooks, or order from your favorite publisher.  Rod and Staff and Christian Light both make an excellent and very reasonable line of preschool workbooks, if you want the Christian variety.  And they cost less than $25.00 for the series, IIRC, and last most of the school year.

Are there older siblings that could help the 6th grader when you're giving time to the little one?  Or could another one of your kids 'babysit' the baby for a .25 cents for 20 minutes or so?  Use bribery!  A neighbor girl that might give you a half-hour block of time for a buck or two? 

I have a friend that takes her two little ones to the local library for story hour each week - she takes schoolwork along and she and her older girl sit in the library's 'quiet room' and have lessons while the younger kids are occupied.

Have you checked into a DVD or computer program that your 6th grader can use from time to time, when you just can't get to him?  I hesitate to mention them as they're not cheap and not a long-term substitute for one-on-one teaching, but in a pinch... 

With my youngest, I'm finding she'll save 'all' her dreaded work for me - she'll sail thru the easy stuff, but let let her worst subject, usually math in her case, pile up while she 'waits' for me to get to her.  Then I'll open the lesson and find that she could have easily done 3/4's of it without me.  I'm trying to instill in her to do as much as she possibly can without me - then come let me know where's she's stumped and we'll carve out some time.  So when looking at your son's upcoming assignments, mark what you expect him to do, perhaps the review section or any 'hands on' assingment (boys love that part ) before he sits down with you to work.  It might be a morale booster for him (and you!) to see that he really can do a lot on his own...

 Eventually, he will wean himself off of you more and more as he gains confidence and knowledge and your toddler will understand soon that school is important and he has to wait his turn occasionally. 

Good luck to you!  You have an adventure ahead, but it's very do-able and it's smart to see a possible problem before it happens and plan ways to work around and with it...Liz