My DH and I were talking and we came to the conclusion that once we realized the reasons for us being willing to have debt, we were much better suited to avoid it.  With that in mind I thought that we might be able to share our own personnal debt stories in an attempt at cheap therapy. lol!

We went into debt because

1-We moved out of state without doing the proper research on the job market in the new area, and without enough of a savings cushion.  Then we immediately moved back.

2-We wanted better for ourselves than what we had as kids after growing in families where we both often went without things we needed.  After a time need and want became intermingled and it went on the credit cards

3-We bought a house at 22 and 23 years of age only to have DH switch job fields, taking a three dollar an hour pay cut less than 30 days after we signed the mortage.  It was a wise move in the long run, but those first two years were VERY lean.

We are working out of debt because

1-We are only in our mid 20s and still want to have fun!  Yet we don't want that fun to haunt us into our thirties and beyond.

2-We can not have children biologically so we need to be in a position to finance an adoption without jepordising that child's future by adding the hardship of thousands of dollars in loans to cover the legal fees.

3-We are watching my parents and DH's parents approach thier twilight years with no hope of living any quality of life, and the thought of being in that position terrifies us.

Hi what caused my debt was???

1. moving back home to my parents and a hubby getting into trouble with the irs. all takin care of now..

2. selling off the beat up buick of mine at a cheaper price

3. beating medicially retired and slowing by each month getting out of dept.

4. And my smoking I finally quit on chantic will be rich by the next 2 years..

5. to many loto tickets and thrift shops so little time...

If there is a will there is away to get out of dept..

seeya

cynthia

Other than our mortgage, and the small balances on several of my credit cards (which I pay off every month), we have no debt. But I made way too easy on myself while Christmas shopping, to just whip out the plastic and charge it!! I can see why and how so many people get into credit card debt!! I am also an impulse buyer. I have never been able to walk into a store, with a list in hand, and walk out with only the items on my list!! Over the past year or 2, I've slowly been weaning myself out of spending the money leftover, in our checking account, just because it's there!! It's not always been easy, but I've enjoyed being able to watch our savings grow each month, and avoid overdraft protection fees!

Now my goals are to get our grocery budget under control, use up food, cleaners, etc. that we have on hand, find ways to save on utilities, and save diesel fuel by planning my errands, etc. for 1 day per week!! I/We are also going to cut way back on Christmas in 2008!! When your parents and inlaws are getting on you for spending too much, there's a problem! lol

Cheap therapy? Well, what other kind would frugal people go for, LOL!

Our debts are medical and work expense.

The medical expenses could have been avoided with insurance. My husband seems to find jobs that don't offer it so we have struggled with that over the years.

The work expenses are something I am not pleased with and I have to get that in check. My husband had to provide his own truck for work. His smaller, paid for one was not getting the job done so he upgraded by financing one. At the time we felt this was a good decision because we were trying to build credit at the time to be able to purchase a house and the company paid an allowance each month to reimburse some of the costs associated with providing the truck. He also got a credit card to use for work expenses.

The company he worked for lost their contract and laid all the techs off. So we are left with this truck to pay off without the reimbursement money. 

He now works for a company where he has some high expenses. In 2008, the truck which we have not yet paid off will no longer be acceptable for the job he does. The company is trying to decide if they want to change how they handle this and provide the trucks themselves. I am hoping they do provide them because we can not take on more debt. This leaves me feeling bitter about a lack of control over our own money.

Besides the mortgage, our debt is from Dh job loss, finally getting a new job that didn't pay as much but higher commuting costs, longer hours for less pay.  After 4yrs he is were he should have been salary wise a couple of years ago.  Him not getting extra work, dealing with things. Me not being able to work even part time until recently. I tried an ebay business, got homestay students which isn't reg income unless you have a fulltime year round student. My mom wasn't available for babysitting until recently because of my father. Reg. Daycare is too expensive here. $10hr for 2 kids.

 Something coming up each time we have extra money!  cost of living, not cutting back to the bone.  Now it seems that everytime we get sorted to get ahead, something happens. I got a job, now have been laid off. Not enough hours for unemployment insurance. the usual story of each time we get ahead, something happens. I am looking into different options for bringing in more money.

 Not that he really knows it yet but in January we are going to have some serious talks about goals, future etc now that we are getting a bit of sleep! and he gets off at a normal time. I have been mentioning it.   We need to figure out what is the best for our life. 

Our debt? Hmmmm I wonder......let me think........oh yea!! Me. Well mostly me. I am not money wise so when we first got married, I was naive and well stupid. I think for us it was just making bad decisions. Or me making bad choices. And burying my head in the sand thinking that if I ignore it it doesn't exist. Reminds of a little kid playing peekaboo. Yes I know its not very good or responsible way of thinking. I truelly had no role models or teachers growing up to help me so I just spent spent spent. Now however, I am trying and can be very frugal in some areas and stick to the budget at times. his is why I told hubby to put me on an allowance he will keep all the cash and cards. Budgeting and bill paying will be done together. He is actually very good with money and all that. I am just at times very upset with myself for having it take almost 17 years to take hold. Sorry for the ramble.

Anne

I didn't have an allowance or was allowed to work as a teen (my dad) unless he didn't know about it. so I had some catching up to do and made unwise decisions for a very long time. I always paid my way and my debts though.  I know we can pay off our debts.  Now coming out of the fog of young kids, reading this forum and other blogs etc. I have new goals etc. Frankly I never spent as much money as I do now, always in the stores because I am the main shopper for everything in the house! so buying extras is easy :) buying craft stuff because I love doing crafts but not having the time so I keep getting more in hope, same with the garden etc. Need to  Nights don't work for me, too tired for crafts.  wasted food because I have to buy what the others would eat and cook what they would eat, then wasted leftovers etc.  I prefer big salads or just some eggs etc for dinner. They know all that is going to change the older the kids get.

Anne, It is always best to go with your strengths and know your weaknesses. It is not like you are sticking your head in the sand and don't know what is going on. At least he is good at it and willing to do it.

Guilt from my divorce. My first Christmas separate from my ex was very lean - I bought toys second hand (kids were little) and nothing else. My ex bought a ton of stuff for them. They were devastated that they had to leave those great toys, bikes, sports stuff at his house ( 4 blocks away) and come to my house which was sparsely furnished. I truly believed that i had to buy their affection instead of finding inexpensive/free ways to have fun. So....I've been charging up holiday and birthday presents for nearly ten years and each year I get further away from paying off the previous year's debt. Insane, i know, but even though they are in high school and college, i am JUST beginning to be honest about my hubby and my financial situation - that we earn less than their dad and have to think before purchasing anything. The truth is that I loved the simplicity of having very little extra cash. We rarely watched tv (no cable) and used the library, took bike rides and were involved with no-fee activities. I think it was my own guilt at not making the marriage work that made me think they needed stuff from me to be happy. (okay, i know it was) . My kids almost only ask for help when it's software they need for college, or gas to get to their summer jobs, or help with paying for musical instruments and assorted equipment (for my future rockstar son). I'm the one that panics when they say, "Oh dad bought me a brand new  <insert latest craze here>"

This year is going to be my turn-around year and I will be honest....with myself and with them concerning finances.

Money was no problem in my first marriage, although happiness was.  When I married again, I was used to a lifestyle and kept living it even though the money wasn't the same!  It was a big shock when DH was laid off and he had to make a career change and the choice was bad.

Now that he has a different job where he is happy and has a chance of advancement, we are playing catch-up.  He has decided to get interested in the finances and I am having real trouble not being defensive about how I've been doing the budget.  He wants to go in a different direction about paying down debt and I feel like he is critisizing what I have been doing.  I've got to remember this is a team effort!

re-tired

A combination of things: Credit card debt:

1. We had some medical debt from the birth of our first son 3 years ago. We have good insurance but his NICU stay still cost us over $3000 and I wasn't working for 3 months so it had to go on the credit card. When we finally got that almost paid off, baby number 2 arrived and we had another short NICU stay--only cost $1500 but again, I wasn't working for 3 months. I did use savings to help us during that time pay all our other bills but we had to put the $1500 on a credit card. So back up to over $2000 on the credit card.

2. A damaged garage door needed replacing and we decided to do both at the same time so they would look the same. Thought our tax refund would cover it all but it was about $700 short. Again, on the credit card.

3. DH finished his Master's degree in May. While we were able to pay for some out of pocket as he progressed through school, some had to go on the credit card. Even with his increase in salary, we haven't knocked all that debt off yet. About $1000.

4. I admit I can't shop from a list. If I go to a store with the purpose of buying DS a pair of shoes, I see a sale and buy some more. I need to be better disciplined and only take cash and leave the credit card at home.

5. We have some home equity debt from remodeling our kitchen in 2005. It was worth it because we can actually eat as a family --a table will finally fit--and have the fridge in the same room as the other appliances! This is a debt that I wish we could pay more on as the interest rate is not the best. Once we pay off the credit cards, I think we can put another $200 toward this debt each month and really make a good dent.

2008 will have some financial challenges as my paycheck goes down about $140 a month with the new cost of health/dental insurance. Almost didn't get dental insurance but with 2 children and some potential dental issues myself, I thought we should have it rather than guess what it could cost out of pocket (and come up short). Our property taxes increased on our home and our mortgage went up about $100 more a month. So we have been budgeting that increase along with my paycheck decrease. January will be interesting....