Well, if you're not married yet I would STRONGLY advise premarital counseling. Our church made us do 10 sessions with an older couple who had been married a minimum of 20 years while reading a book and workbook together over several months. It brought up a lot of issues and differences that we worked through, like money and family differences. Family always influences money, so we discussed how our parents handled money in great detail and read Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud. We were both in agreement with Dave Ramsey's philosophies on money for the most part and agreed beforehand how to handle tithing and charitable giving. If you're Christian, my husband and I also recommend Sacred Marriage. If you're a Christian entrepreneur, we recommend Larry Burkett's book, Business by the Book. You should also agree on financial roles. I keep an eye on our spending, do all the shopping and meal planning, and handle all of our travel planning. My hubby pays all the bills and keeps track of the software side of our finances, interfaces with our accountant, and handles our retirement accounts.
Practically, we combined our finances a few months before the wedding. Basically we picked his credit union (USAA) over mine and just had me added to his existing account. I ported over my money to the account and all the money and debts were "ours" from day 1. We added each other as beneficiaries to all of our retirement accounts and insurance policies and looked into life insurance right away. We got a safe deposit box at the bank (Chase gives free ones to military members and veterans) to put all of our important documents in and kept scanned copies of financial documents (marriage license, last year's tax return, etc) on hand. Execute a quick will and healthcare directive - a really basic one is just fine - early on in your marriage so that everything is handled in case of emergency. If this seems like overkill, know that I had a life-threatening health situation a little over a year into our marriage! These things happen!
In terms of spending, keep all of your housing costs (including utilities and insurance) to under 25% to 30% of your income. Right now, our housing costs are about 20% of our monthly income. Keep a good eye on how much you spend on eating out - all the "cheap" dinners and coffees add up. Meal planning alone slashed our grocery bill in half. We cancelled our cable and use our Apple TV to stream Netflix, Hulu, and professional sports. I also watch shows on Amazon Prime. We drive used cars that are paid off or were purchased cash and maintain them regularly to avoid expensive repairs. We buy a lot of healthy food in bulk at Costco or at the farmer's markets and pack our lunches every day. We don't spend a lot of money on hobbies or going out, but we will go on a nice date once a month and try to go on vacation for a week each year. Never, ever go without health insurance - even if its just the catastrophic kind, have something in place.
As for budgeting, we go out to dinner somewhere at the end of the month and write up a budget sitting in a restaurant booth. Its a nice to have someone cook your dinner while you can chat about more important things. We deduct all the mandatory and largely static expenses from our income (housing, gas, tithing, student loans, utilities). We also automatically transfer a set amount every month towards our "slush fund," which funds any car repairs, gifts, travel, and charitable giving. We try to spend as little of the slush fund as possible so that we're never short on Christmas money or caught off guard by expensive SUV maintenance. Then we budget for our planned or expected expenses for the month. For instance, this month I have to replace a cellphone and get new glasses and hubby needs 2 new shirts and a new sportcoat for the office. Then we budget for a little pocket money and set a budget for "household expenses" which is a catch-all pot that includes groceries, toiletries, household cleaning supplies, beauty, etc. The "household" pot works for us because if I spend too much money on groceries during the month, I know to reduce my spending in other areas. Any remaining money we throw on our student loans, which is our biggest financial priority. We take all of our employer matching for retirement, but otherwise EVERYTHING else goes to the student loans. Once the loans are paid off we'll throw a lot more towards retirement and hopefully save for a house, but for now, I work for Sallie Mae! Once its all written out, I come home and input it all into Mint and Quicken to track over the course of the month. I track our spending every other day or so and then review how we did at the end of the month before our budget meeting. We also hold quarterly "family meetings" to set bigger goals and see how we're progressing.