I have alot to learn from you all.  My daughter pays for NOTHING.  She makes about $100 a week babysitting.  She's been putting it in a savings account.  We are paying for her gas, insurance and repairs, unless it's something she did.  She is taking summer school classes to graduate this summer.  After that she  will be responsible for her gas.  We told both kids as they are  in school we'd pay for gas, insurance and cell phone. During the summer they pay their own gas.  I thinik splitting the repair bill is fair, but I'm sure we'd end up paying it all. 

 

personally I think he should pay at least half since he has had free use of the car.   He will have learn about paying for the privilage of having a car soon enough.

lucky we live near lots of transportation so if they want a car, they can pay for it themselves.   When they are old enough to drive, they can split the bill for young drivers courses.

 Well after talking with some friends I believe he should pay for the whole thing. He has had free use of the car for almost 2 years. That's some inexpensive travel costs for a teenager. We paid the last big repair plus we have paid all the maintenance. DH is not going to agree so 1/2 it will be.

livingsimple:

I have alot to learn from you all.

Many of us respect and desire self-sufficient living. Most of us desire or work towards being/remaining debt free and paying our own way for things in cash.

By carrying our teen and young adult children entirely or bailing them out of difficulty, we create the very problem we are seein a materialisitic society where people are not very frugal and self-sufficient. Early on there has to be a balance between assisting them and allowing them to learn to be responsible. As they age though, they should take on more responsibility for their own lives and selves.

When our oldest was sixteen, she decided to get a job. We would have never have asked her to pay for housing and utilitity costs. We did expect her to pay for the extras she wanted like $80 shoes and a fancy cell. If she had wanted to attend college, we would have helped her look at options and likely assisted with some costs but not all. Living at home, rent free but not responsibility free is one of the assistances we are offering our kids who want to attend college. We are ok with giving them a car but they have to pay for the fuel they use and maintenance if it's only for their use. We'd cover insurance if the vehicle is in my husband's name and on his policy. There are some other details but I don't recall them all. We will have to revaluate this for son when 18 comes closer.

 

 

well since your son hasn't been paying anything, it may be a big shock to pay for the full repair this time but next time.... kids need to learn life costs money.

 

Actually, your situation isn't whether to have your son pay for car repairs or not, it's that you & your husband don't agree &  stand united to  tell him your decisions. As a Christian, I believe that I defer to my husband's decisions, so I would  agree to have him pay half.I think you & hubby need to talk & discuss what you each are expecting from your son, sounds like you each have different expectations of financial respondsibility .Maybe your husband 's family paid for things cars & college for him & he thinks that's whathe should do too or that his family should have done that , so he wants to do that for your son. God bless,lisa

ohionative:

Actually, your situation isn't whether to have your son pay for car repairs or not, it's that you & your husband don't agree &  stand united to  tell him your decisions.

You hit the nail on the head. Your son can sense that you and your husband aren't in agreement. Between this car situation and his quitting his second job, he could be playing you two against each other in order to improve his outcome. In other words, if he doesn't have that second job, then there's less money coming in and he won't have money for car repair, so the FULL burden of repair falls back on you parents.