Ron, a new client who projects completing payoff of his only remaining debt, his mortgage, in 4 years writes to say...

"Greg,
 
I have decided to keep my mouth shut about paying off my mortgage until I have reached the goal. Every time I mention paying of my mortgage I get the same type of response. "You're crazy," "don't waste your cash, enjoy your life," or "your interest rate is 5.25%, what are you thinking?" I know that when this is done my cost of living will drop by a whopping 33% and I can quit my job if I want.

-- Ron"

Should you share your goal of a debt-free life with your family and friends, or should you keep your mouth shut until you're hosting your mortgage burning party?

This is a tricky question...

It reveals the heart of human nature. Your goal may be seen as a clarifying insight into the contradictions of  present-day financial wisdom... or a threat to the status quo.

Motivational speaker Zig Ziglar offers this advice...

Share your "Give-Up" goals (i.e., give up smoking, being rude, procrastinating, being late, eating too much, etc.) with many people. Chances are excellent they're going to encourage you.

This sounds right, doesn't it? There seems to be no lack of helpful goal "police" when you're trying to give-up some debilitating habit.

Zig goes on to say...

Share your "Go-Up" goals (i.e., where you want to try to do, acquire, or achieve something) with people who will encourage you and help you achieve them.

This also makes sense. Why tell someone who has no interest in encouraging you -- or helping you achieve them -- about  your plans to dramatically improve your family financial condition? Worse than jealousy, this may inspire the much more destructive envy and lead to sabotage.

The question then becomes, is Debt-Freedom a "Give-Up" or a "Go-Up" goal?

On one hand you're giving up debt as a way of personal financial life. On the other hand you're going up the ladder of financial success.

I think you can decide based on debt type.

Put credit cards and car loans in the "Give Up" category. Share this aspect of your Debt-Freedom goal with lots of people. You'll find plenty of  "police" to help keep you on the straight and narrow.

Put student loans and mortgages in the "Go Up" category. Share these only with supporters, but be aware they may not be your everyday acquaintances. You might have to reach back a generation -- mom, granddad -- to find an experienced supportive ear: Someone who's already paid off a mortgage or two... and student loans didn't haunt them into retirement.

Of course, you don't have to tell anyone anything about your Debt-Freedom goals. Just be prepared to answer questions about your new, more relaxed demeanor and playfulness... an interesting side-effect of getting free.

Whom have you told -- outside of this anonymous forum --  and how did they respond?

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Greg Moore is the Creator of the Wealth Building System
'DebtIntoWealth -- Lessons from My Journey to Debt Freedom'

   "My husband is due to retire from the Navy in just two
    years at a young 42 years old, and right around then,
    using your system, we'll be completely debt free, which
    means  we could literally never have to work another day,
    if we choose."    -- Andrea Davis, South Korea

Get Lesson 1 FREE: Click now:
http://www.debtintowealth.com/loadlesson1.html

 Other than the forum we keep everything to ourselves.  Neither my husband nor I feel sharing with family or close friends is necessary.  Few in the family share our goals, and we are not close enough to our friends to feel comfortable enough to share personal income or outgo issues.

I know Mrs Brian, you have been so good to share.......but I don't feel comfortable putting things out on the internet, I'll order things on line but I don't do banking.  I love the paper method and have most things sent to me and them pay. Only a few things do I do an automatic draw.  I would tell how much I make but not what I owe.  Any way I vote don't tell all.

 I think I am fortunate in this area. I live in a small rural town where country life is still evident. Many in my family and my husband's family are frugal. I can discuss frugality and finances without being given a lot of negative feedback.

It doesn't bother me to share income, expenses or debt online. I am more wary about sharing the names of the institutes I bank with however.

 I have to agree with Brianschef also. I don't share my ideas with any family members, and very few local friends. In the past when I share with family it is then assumed I will "help them out" with one thing or another because I can afford to. On the other hand if I remain modest in gift giving and my attire, they think I'm not "making it." There is no happy middle ground there. My "friends" prefer to pity the coworker who takes the bus. I have been asked about it in the past and when I explain why I'm not making an effort to get a car they get stand-offish. So  I keep my ideas about money management to myself and DH of coarse. It is very nice to have others that have similar beliefs.

 My husband is the big brother of his family and the first they turn to with money questions.  We offer advise whenever it's appropriate and try to live by example.  "No, we don't have new cars, we've got other goals to accomplish first".  His family wanted us to go on a family vacation to the beach.  We had just gone to the exact same place two years ago.  We had already allocated our vacation dollars elsewhere and attempted to politely decline.  It didn't work.  His overly emotional brother actually said that if he could afford it, certainly we could.  The problem is, he CAN'T afford it.  We did just send our sil our financial peace audio set upon her request.  We couldn't get it in the mail fast enough since they are close to making a very poor real estate decision (imo).  The other side of the family is more frugal, and we all see money in pretty much the same way.  We still openly ask each other's opinions on different financial matters.  Another great place that we are able to share our money goals is our Financial Peace group.  We enjoyed the class so much, we began to get together every 3 months to keep up with each other.  That has been a great encouragement since we're all on the same page with what we learned in the class. 

I agree with Brianschef. There are very few that share our view. One couple that introduced us to Financial Peace University has done nothing with their debt, in fact they've bought more stuff. So they say one thing but do another. It makes it difficult at times for us to discipline our spending to pay off debt with so little emotional support.

I am just open by nature.  Everyone I know knows how tight my budget is.  I try to be a good example of how to live on public benefits without being a Welfare Queen.

We are pretty much waiting until he house is paid off before we say too much.  We will have it paid off in 13 years. And boy will I be so glad that we OWN it! 

Then we'll celebrate and let folks know.  And then they will believe it's possible since we actually did it.

 Frugalista