I do not have children but my best friend and her daughter have a mother & daughter day usually at least 2X per month and she says it has really brought them closer together which i think is great sometimes it is something like going to a lunch hour,target or just to each others homes.

I am pleased to have 8 older adult children , I am amazed at wonderful people .. our Oldest son took the business and was God sent when my DH was undergoing cancer . His wife was an Angel and a good friend the other boys are  strong in faith work hard for the business and their familes they are totally devoted to Daddy and I , my two older Daughters are amazing women and Great Mothers I still have children at home they are a joy but they are going up with family all around ..

and Grand children are a joy that make it so much fun .. 

I am truly blessed.

Dear All, Just out of curiosity, do you see the beginnings of a pattern of adult children who lose their homes &/or jobs in this economy moving back into the parental home?  I once interviewed (when I was still able to write) a social worker in Ohio, & she said taht most similar events were of adult children moving into their GRANDparents' homes.

Yours in Him, Deb

Deb,

I am seeing more adults living with their parents or other family members. That has not been as uncommon in my family or in my husband's as it has been for many others however.

Dear Brandy, Are adults livign with their parents or other family members paying rent?  Are there family rules that they are asked to follow?  It was these kinds fo things that I was trying to write about, back lsat year.  Yours in Him, Deb

Deborahmichelle:

Are adults livign with their parents or other family members paying rent?  Are there family rules that they are asked to follow?

Each one works things differently, Deb. It's mutually beneficial for several of them.

My adult children have lived with me and my husband, at one point or another. I never wanted them to leave home. Yes, they needed to live out in the real world, but I grew up in a household in which my mother kicked me out, literally, the day after graduation. She threw my things on the floor of my bedroom and told me to pack up and get out. I was the oldest of 5 children and had been the 'mother' to my brother and sisters. I wasn't very scared for me, but since I had been the caregiver for my siblings, I was scared of what would happen to them. They adjusted and went on with life. But because of that, I vowed never to force my children from my home. Our country is one of the only countries in the world who expects our children to leave home at the age of eighteen. It's not unusual, in other countries, for several generations to live under one roof or, at the very least, live on the same property. It used to be that way here. Sort of like the Waltons. In my case, two of our children are unable, due to disabilities, to live on their own, and our youngest son has moved back to our property, since losing the home they were renting to someone who bought it and will be living in it.

I love being the parent of adult children since, eventually, it means grandchildren (and I have seven). I believe it's God's way of compensating me for the honor and hard work of being a parent. What a great reward! And at a time when I can see those little words of wisdom that I tried to impart to my children while they were growing up (all those times when I didn't think they were listening), coming back to me through their mouths. I smile and stay silent.

cgbascom, I loved your post. What you said is so true. I have 3 adult children and 1 grandchild, and I am so blessed. All those times we think what we are saying is going in one ear and out the other, some of it is actually being absorbed.My dh and I hear them say something and we just have to say "wow, they did hear us!" We are very proud of them.

We have been empty nesters for nearly 10 years.  Wow!  That time has gone by so quickly.  I think the biggest challenge is having to watch your adult children make their decisions without seeking advice.  Our oldest daughter is also very headstrong and obstinate even when she was an infant.  Now she is 30.  She has mellowed some in her way of thinking but still very stubborn.   Our youngest daughter, who is 28, got married last year to a guy who is 20 years older than her, he is the same age as us.   

All you can do Brandy is just to be there and give her a soft place to fall when she lands flat on her face.  It happens to all of us, she will make poor decisions.

My second child (of three) just turned 18 and is preparing to move into my in-law apartment when she graduates high school next week. She's been working for six-months and she'll be paying rent but its a small fraction of what she would pay if she moved all the way out, not to mention the free toilet paper and meals with us whenever she needs it. She wants to be independent but I'm glad to be able to still help her some.

My oldest never wanted to work or to leave at all, preferring to use and abuse my home and income. It took a very real threat to have her physically removed (along with her no good friends who also showed up to eat my food and mess up my space when I was at work) for her to actually get a job and move out to a rented room. When I bought my house I let her come back and grandfather into my apartment so now, two years later, she is actually a (mostly) responsible mother to be. She thought she was happy being supported but she has since told me she is much happier being independent and apologized for her awful behavior.

The last one has six more years to his flight. We'll see what adventure that fledging brings.