Discovered a link to a blog called debtfree-revolution.com  about her putting her teenage son on food budget. He was complaining about what she bought, guzzling milk like there was no tomorrow etc so she got fed up and has been updating the progress each week. very interesting. reading the comments is informative too. scares me what my food bills will be like when the kids are teenagers!

http://www.debtfree-revolution.com/2008/03/14/putting-teenage-son-on-a-budget/

Put a lock on the fridge just a joke there but not really a joke a strick tpye of allowance should do if the teen runs out of food money that should work cured a kid thaat lived at my husand and my house at the time...

While I think its a good concept, reading all the posts I certainly don't agree with the "milk" thing; or the fact that she doesn't plan to increase his budget if the cost of food rises (which its doing all the time).  Sounds less like teaching a lesson and more like negligence when you get into that area, imho.  My mother taught me how to shop at her side, so I knew the cost of things, how to make a budget, etc. When I wanted special snacks and things at the grocery, that came out of my own $$. But the basic day to day foods...I should send her this link. She'd rant up a storm at this lady LOL

If you read the whole series of blogs, 5 I think so far, you will see that is not the case.  He has other money in his fun envelopes etc and he can earn money by extra chores but he didn't want too.   She tried teaching him but it wasn't getting though so I guess he has to learn his way.

Actually I read all of them before I posted.  Hence the "milk" thing.  If she put him on an envelope budget like hers, and he makes the decision to send a gift (regardless of who its too or what it is if its bought with his $$) instead of buying extra milk then she's being a hypocrite by not allowing him to do so. He's borrowing leftover $ from his grocery envelope to pay postage on something else. That fits in the envelope system.

I don't think the whole thing project is a bad idea, I just think she's implementing it poorly.  You can't say "I'm putting you on the same budget system I'm on and you can make your budget decisions" and then not allow them to make their decisions.

 I guess I agree with her about the gift. since it is a strange situation. not one I would flavour speaking as parent. 

I suppose, but I wouldn't have a problem with it.  I moved to MA because I had internet friends here I met when I was 13. We're all still great friends and see each other at least once of month, and all of them are guys. My mom didn't have an issue with it because she trusted me and my judgement. I was always very self-reliant (being a latch-key kid in elementary school will do that for you, I guess). He is 14 after all. She obviously let him buy the gift, but won't let him send it? Strange, imho. Her, not the situation. It seems common in this day and age.  Its 2008 after all, the internet is the social scene now adays. I met dear bf online, and we've been living together for over 3 years now

Actually I think I'd rather my kids have internet boyfriends & girlfriends...no high school pregnancies that way LOL

I don't mind online friends but him sending expensive gifts but not getting any is a bit strange. $50 is a lot for a 14yr old.  I don't quite remember the post, not enough coffee in me yet.  I think she can't stop him shopping but doesn't want to go out of the way to help him send it.   Actually she has another post, he actually asked her for grocery shopping help.

The thing is we don't know this kid. Trust me they are all different.  I have to be harder on my daughter then my son because she has a lazy streak and a stubborn streak.  Now she is a smart lovely kid with lots of ability. Its not being able to do something but lacking the desire to do it.  I had to force her to potty train at 4 by just taking pullups away.  as one example.  No dessert if you don't eat etc. (picky eater)  My son just eats about anything.  He justs gets dressed.  she reminds me of my father and my dh! 

now its the home reading battle. getting better.

On more than one occasion, for an extended period of time, I have had as many as five teenaged males in my household.  I have had to "reel" in their "grazing" on numerous occasions!  They were all very active in sports and their appetites were a reflection of their activity! 

I have never been a purchaser of convenience foods or junk-type fillers.  We did not purchase cold cereal as a breakfast food--I cooked eggs, pancakes, homemade biscuits, etc. for all of the kids who lived with us.  I found that, by filling them with a good hearty breakfast, I could keep them out of the kitchen and the cupboards!

After saying all of that, I never had to put my kids on a food budget.  Whatever I fixed, they gladly consumed!  But...my kids were not allowed to complain about what was served/provided.  When you grow up in a large family, you learn to be THANKFUL that you get called to the supper table!  Consequently, you learn not to belly-ache about the food, 'cause someone else will GLADLY eat what you don't want!  And....they helped by hunting/fishing and putting some meat on the table.  They also had to help with harvesting, canning, food preparation, butchering, perusing the sale papers, purchasing groceries, etc. and were well-prepared for purchasing their own groceries when they left home.

I am all for teaching kids lessons that will prepare them for real life.  I think this mom had tried every other way to get her message across to this son.  I see no harm in allowing him to learn TANSTAAFL, which stands for There Ain't No Such Thing As A Free Lunch!  Miss Paula in Texas

I agree with you to an extent MFI, I think she's just going about it the wrong way. She shouldn't propose that he use an envelope system and then deny him the ability to use it.  I agree that teaching kids lessons that prepare them for real life is a good idea. I guess I just don't understand....I was raised that yes you ate what was put on the table, but we were never denied food if we wanted it and could finish it.   We were also taught its rude to eat infront of others, and if guests show up around supper time you churned out more to feed them.  Maybe its a Southern thing...life revolves around food and lots of it.   Our clothes were second-hand but we always had seconds at the dinner table!

I think its the milk thing that just really does irk me, considering the nutritional needs of a 14 year old boy. If we went through 4 gallons of milk a week we did, and that was on a very low single income.  Otherwise I don't have much of a problem with her system. Its all about the milk LOL