Check with the Boy Scouts of America. Their Exploring program (for ages 14-20) is open to girls and offers groups focused on careers, hobbies, or special interests. If there isn't already a group that she likes in your area, the BSA will help you start one.

The BSA has high standards for character (for both youth and adult leaders), plus the low dues include group insurance coverage for field trips. If you identify any promising leaders, the BSA offers leadership development and recognition programs--great for college applications and adult life.

If you prefer to attract only girls, then you can focus your Post (the BSA's term for individual clubs) on girly activities. However, I would strongly encourage you to leave your group open to the occasional boy who may be interested. You will find that diversity improves the learning experience for everybody. My Post's chief advisor always said that opening up our previously boys-only Post to girls (and we never had more than one female member at any given time) was a tremendous improvement.

Homeschooling is a challenge

I was homeschooled from birth and when I reached your daughter's age, I wanted more social opportunities as well.  In our state (UT), we were allowed to take classes part time at the public school, so I enrolled in band, and later, art.  Those 2 hours were all I could stand of the public school environment (home was much more conducive to learning and being supported in my values), but it was fun to be part of something bigger than my family.  You could look in to part time  enrollment options in your state.  I also enjoyed being part of community service projects and church groups, as well as dance classes.  I will say that most of my friends were found not at classes but at church activities and service activities and through meeting my parents friends' kids.  For me, having just a few good friends was always preferable to having tons of acquaintances that I didn't really know well.  What your daughter is interested in is a good guide for what activities she could do where she might find likeminded friends.  Starting a club is also a great idea - let her help design it!  You could do one for anyone in the community with a common interest, or you could do one just for homeschooled girls.  There are some club formats for homeschoolers that you can download to get ideas at www.americanyouthleadership.org if you are interested, or you could just invent something new based on her interests.   4H is also a great resource, anyone can be involved in it and you can also start clubs through them and offer them to the community.  She could start a service club, a quilting club, a nature club, chess club, anything!  And you could build in socializing time so it is not all formal with no time to just talk and have fun.  If you build it, they will come!  There are probably others looking for just what you are trying to provide.  Good luck!

Thank you so much, everyone, for your posts.  Many of you have affirmed what I believe, that socialization is not necessarily the goal here.  My desire is the development of good positive friendships while maintaining the lifestyle for which we chose--home schooling.  Someone I read here wrote:  "I want my child to be civilized, not socialized."  My daughter has been a cellist since 4th grade, so now in her 5th year of study, she has become a member of our local symphony.  It has a broad range of ages from about 13 to 80.  She does seem to enjoy the group, as there are several teens around her age to get to know.

I guess I am coming to the realization that we are indeed on the right track.  I want to thank those of you who have shared your experiences with homeschooling a single child in your family.  It IS a very different experience from a home-full of children, yet it does have it's advantages.  I have become so much closer to our daughter and developed a deep relationship with her that I know will carry her through the teen and young adult years.  I am truly able to disciple her, day by day.  This was not possible with our older two children who went to public high school.  We were very involved in their education AT SCHOOL, and though we coached their ski racing team and spent lots of time with them, their peers were still very influential in their development.  I thank God that He showed us that He wants us to be the primary influence on our last child, and I know He will be faithful to provide the friendships and relationships outside of our home that He wants to use to grow her into a Godly woman. 

I will investigate the resources you have mentioned.  If anyone has any other ideas, please post them for us. 

Thank you,

Claudia (mom of lonely only)

Tizzy Lizzy,

Your post gave me several good ideas to pursue.  Thank you so much.  We live in the litigious state of California, so I need to find out what the liability issues may be for her volunteering.  She would love to assist a local veterinarian...I am going to pursue it.  I also like the idea of being available to help others, whether it be elderly or young moms, etc.  What age did your daughter start doing these things? 

Claudia

Thank you for your post.  I got several good ideas from you, and appreciate the encouragement!

Claudia

Claudia, our oldest dd started volunteering at our local hospital when she was 13.  That's their minimum age, but others may differ.  She had to take a short training course at the hospital before she could begin (be sure to include any such 'training sessions' in her permanent record).  She loved it and ended up putting in over 500 volunteer hours and was eventually offered part-time work there - and any volunteer work looks good on future job and college applications, remember .

Our youngest began helping around church at 10 or so.  If they're good workers and can take orders (halfway) cheerfully, they get called on to help.  Can you get her started helping in the church nursery, children's church or even assisting in the church kitchen?  Dd has helped serve meals at daytime funeral dinners; there's just not many people available during the day to help sometimes.

I'll have to pick my brain (shouldn't take long...) and try to remember what the kids have done over the years and perhaps post more later.  Sound like you're on the right track, though...Liz 

Two suggestions:  1.  My kids aren't homeschooled, but have group-dated with many high caliber hs kids they've met through seminary (daily scripture study before school at the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints; available all over the country!)  It's open to all youth 14-18 years old, any denomination, public or home schooled, and costs nothing (staffed by volunteers!!!) There's about 150 youth attending our local seminary classes.  (Check out lds.org if you're interested in finding one in your area.)  Thanks to the association there, my son has had an enriching high school social circle!

 2.  Different parents of hs kids in our town have established some great theatre and singing groups that perform throughout surrounding communities (Shakespeare, Laura Ingalls Wilder, etc.).  These are open to all youth, hs or otherwise..  The culture and education that these hs kids bring to my kids and the commutinty is awesome.  Maybe you can be the parent to start such a group and bring great culture to the "culturally starved"!  Thanks to you parents who take on home schooling!

Claudia,

I have younger girls,but we are part of a Catholic girls group,'Little Flowers'-like Girl Scouts. They also have an older kids group and they have different badges they earn,based on their interests-could be certain requirements for Horsemanship etc. It is Called 'Pilgrims of The Holy Family. There is also 'Keepers of the Faith' similiar for Christains. You could probably come up with your own requirements if you wanted. While initially it might be more work,I am sure there are other parents who would like wholesome activities for their girls as well. I bet even as far as away as an hour. Keep those kids busy!

Amy

P.S. I know how that is-I have a teen at home w/ no friends.

Amy,

Thank you for your post.  Are there not many homeschooled teens in your area?  I'm finding many parents, even Christian parents, are sending their teens to public high school.  Having sent two older children to that high school (only one in town) I know it is not an option we wish to pursue.  I am committed to seeing her through high school at home.  I just pray daily God will open the right doors to the fellowship she needs for positive character growth and friendship.

Claudia