I work outside the home and have 2 boys (ages 5 and 3) and a third baby due soon. I understand feeling streched to accomplish it "all" in one day.
I agree with the PP about flylady. Her books and the Side-tracked Home Executive book are great resources and can be found at the library. I didn't follow everything to the letter but the general ideas were so very helpful. Tackling small projects at a time, setting the timer for 15 minutes to focus on one task, picking up and putting away 5 things, focusing on one area of the house only (like bathrooms).
Also, it helps that my husband does not expect me to be the "ideal housewife" (whatever that is) and has taken on some of the duties as well like grocery shopping, picking up the boys from school (we alternate), starting dinner (he is great at making salads and loves to grill) and taking care of our dog's needs. We also alternate doing bedtime for our boys. Whoever takes care of bath/bed duty for the boys, the other spouse doing another task like folding laundry, unloading the dishwasher, or sorting the mail mountain, etc. (I like to fold laundry or iron b/c I can sneak some TV watching in!, DH likes to go through our mail and watch ESPN). We alternate making dinner (well, I do most of the cooking b/c I like to cook) but whoever does the cooking doesn't do the dishes. Soon, our oldest son will help us more in that area (clean up, not cooking, LOL).
TV watching is saved for after bedtime, like 9 p.m., or weekends. We record what we can't watch instantly. If I sit and watch TV from 7 to 9, nothing gets done.
On the weekends, I generally like to tackle a small cleaning project on Saturday morning (bathrooms, for example) and DH may take care of yard work. I then do something else in the afternoon like vacuuming and dusting while DH does grocery shopping or takes recycling to the center. I don't spend my whole day cleaning as we like to do something as a family but try and do 2 common projects so I'm not getting out all sorts of equipment/cleaners. If I do bathrooms, I do all the bathrooms and nothing else that morning. If I vacuum, I vacuum the whole house at that time. I feel some accomplishment that way.
I also make sure I do some laundry-related chore every single night. I either wash, dry, fold or put away. I have to do this to keep up or else I have a mountain. If I have more than 2 baskets of clean laundry, I cannot wash more until those baskets are folded and put away--my personal rule. I don't like mountains of laundry, clean or dirty, LOL! DH is good at the washing and drying part but folding and putting away are not his strong suits. So we balance that way.
It's a balance and yes, there are some nights when I get home from work and am just exhausted and not much gets done except I feed my family and maybe unload the dishwasher. But that's not every night and I can catch up on the weekends. Taking small steps will help keep you motivated. I've never told myself that I have to clean the whole house at once. I would give up! I tell myself "I can clean this bathroom" or "I can clean the kitchen." Good luck!