Ds talked to a friend who is a licensed counselor and they suggested returning the gift with a note saying 'it's over do not contact.' They suggested she is very sick and at the very least bipolar.

I like the idea of ignoring her; however I think there needs to be in writing verification from my son that it truly is o-v-e-r. She is under the impression that my son is being held against his will from her. (???) Even after he broke up with her.

Funny thing is she's been telling others that she's over him. It's just too weird.

Whether the shirt is thrown away or returned, there needs to be finality...and consequences if she oversteps her boundaries.I am concerned a response from him/us would fuel her need for drama. But what if this isn't the end of her attempts?

SO....either A) Ignore the situation as an impulsive act on her part    or B) send the shirt back with a 'dear jane' letter. Yep, those are the options.

zohner,

ds put the note in the fireplace after reading it yesterday.

I really do not understand this girl or her family AT ALL. They don't think like reasonable regular people.....I haven't a clue what goes in on in their heads. All the females in the family seem to act like this.

BTW for the poster who asked......no baby is involved PTL!

Having been stalked - by the legal definition - document everything that has already occurred and take it to the police.  Continue to document everything.  Your son, as the person being stalked, should notify the girl in writing, by registered mail, that neither he nor anyone else in your family wish any further contact with this girl or any member of her family.  These are the steps the police gave me - in the end, I had to file for a restraining order to get this guy to leave me alone.  In retrospect, I really wish I had done it sooner.  I was urged to go sooner, and didn't, because involving the police seemed so intensive.  This was after our school resource officer (a police officer who is stationed in our school) had fielded a phone call and several attempts by this guy to contact me at school - and even then, it took him showing up at my house again before I finally filed - and that caused both the responding officer at 911 and the jduge to ask what took me so long to take action.

It's a hard thing to do, bringing legal action against anyone, much less someone with a psychiatric disorder (the guy stalking me was diagnosed with obsessive/compulsive disorder, adult ADD, and bipolar disorder) - but you need to protect yourselves.  No matter what this girl thinks about your son being kept from her, no matter who she says told her what or what she has told her family, it is her illness talking.  If the previous actions - quitting his job, dropping Facebook, changing his phone number, etc. have stopped her, then nothing other than a sharp, clean, break - as denoted by legal action, if necessary - is going to stop her.  If she truly has a psychiatric diagnosis, and violates the restraining order, chances are good she will be mandated into therapy; if she is not formally diagnosed, then any lawyer worth even a few cents will argue based on her need for psychiatric assessment, and she will likely be mandated into therapy, either in or out of the jail system.  But however hard it may be to take such action, you need to protect your family.

Good luck to you all.

we went through this with a son and a daughter  ... you have my prayers ..

please doucement everything ... 

My son mailed the shirt back with a note stating, Not Interested, I've moved on, It's over, Do not respond.

I hope that it works !

  Cinnamonhuskies  how is it going I been praying for all of you your heavy on my heart ... check  in you can .

Nothing more has happened but I don't think she may have received the pkg. yet. They moved and I didnt have the new addy and didnt want to ask around so i sent it to the old one in hopes of it being forwarded.

I hope this is the end of her and the drama.