I'm feeling a little desperate.  DH and I have approx. 110K in cc and other debt.  (Not including mortage and car payment.) Long story that you all don't need to be bored with.  We are at the point where we are serious about making changes and trying to knock it out.  We've never missed a payment on anything, no creditors are calling, etc.  We have the low interest rates on the cc's, we have revamped the budget entirely, we are not using the ccs anymore.  We both work FT, have two kids and are trying to really live frugally.  Price lists, coupons, no eating out, etc.  

I'm just feeling like it is all too overwhelming.  Like we are never going to make a dent in the debt.  DH has talked to two fo the debt reduction places, like CCCS.  I'm just not sure if I trust their advice and plans, but don't know if we can ever climb out on our own.  Anyone with advice on those companies, or any encouragement for someone like me?  I don't know anyone as in debt as we are.  

We make enough money to cover all of the basics, but can't make a dent in anything.  Ugh.

First of all, it's not hopeless - and you've started in the right direction.  You're not behind - that's an even better sign.

Second, be very wary of credit services; they often require you to sign over more than you expect, and to pay through them - check around this site for information on CCCS and its competitors.  You'd be better off finding even a slight amount of money in your budget and applying it all to one bill - then take everything you're paying to bill "A" when it's paid off and start working on bill "B".  Call your credit card companies and ask for a lower rate - they may freeze or close your card (keep one open for emergencies until you have savings built up) but that's okay.

There are two school of thought on saving while in debt - one says that you should put all available money toward debt and not save anything until you're completely debt-free; the other says you should do both at the same time, as only having savings will keep you from using the credit cards or other loans in an emergency.  Only you can decide which is better for you, and you'll find people in both camps here and on similar boards.  For myself, I prefer the second option (savings while paying off debt) as having savings keeps me from using my credit card for emergencies; I use the credit card for the emergency, then immediately pay it off from my savings, which is in an account very carefully separate from my other accounts, so I have to think about it before using it.  But that system doesn't work for everyone.

Good luck to you!

 I totally agree with karenteacher. You're current on your payments, and that's a big plus. Using the snowball method, where you throw everything you can at one bill until it's paid off, then use that money plus the payment on the next bill, will make a difference. Call your credit card companies and ask for lower interest rates. Double check all of your insurance to make sure you're not paying for more than you need to. Sometimes auto and medical insurance overlap, for instance. Take whatever money you can find there and put it against debt. Keep reading... the forums and the main site has tons of ways to save. Above all, stop the bleeding. Don't carry the cards with you, put them away and don't use them at all. You will make headway if you really want to.

There are a couple of threads if you haven't found them yet, that might interest you:

Slaying the Debt Dragon in 2009

Debt Freeze

It's not hopeless.  Everyone has given great advice so far.  Here are some other thoughts.

Trent at thesimpledollar.com recommends making minimum payments on everything and saving as much as humanly possible.  Your goal is to get a small emergency account so you don't have to resort to using the CCs again.  However, after you've saved enough for a small emergency account, keep saving until you have enough to pay off 1 of your CCs in full.  Dave Ramsey, if I'm not mistaken, says get a $1,000 emergency account and then "snowball" your payments.  I only add these ideas, b/c each person pays of debt in a different way.  You know what will work best for you; this just gives you more options to explore.  Almost forgot... A lot of people say start snowballing with your payments going towards the highest interest card.  However, you may find it motivating to pay off some of the smaller debt cards first to knock them out of the way.

I'm so glad to hear that you and DH are on the same page financially.  Remember to spend time together every week -- just 15 minutes -- reviewing what you paid, what money was earned, and what you each did to contribute to your new frugal lifestyle.  Be each other's cheerleader.  It sounds like you're about to enter blackbelt frugality; I caution you to go slowly.  If you or your DH feels like you're being deprived, then it loses it's fun.  It's better to find new ways of doing old things and cut from your list slowly, rather than cutting everything at once and feeling completely overwhelmed and deprived.  That's when a lot of people splurge and continue the debt cycle.  Here's an example.  Let's say you and DH eat out 4 times a week.  Start by cutting that back to 1 night a week and cooking the rest of your meals at home.  The next month, start sending leftovers for lunch and packing snacks instead of grabbing from a machine or drive-thru.  The next month after that, learn how to cook 1 new dish a week (4 for the month).  Building new habits slowly is a good way to keep them!

You are not hopeless - its always hard to start a big project and change your behaviour but it can be done. I agree with everyone but want to add a couple of things.

My main help in debt reduction was forward planning.  Do you track your spending at present?  I started doing that in an effort to discover why I wasn't paying down my debt as fast as I should have been, given my income and outgoings.  What I discovered was a lot of money was being frittered away on small things like chocolate bars, magazines, cool drinks, alcohol, fast food snacks, etc.  You will probably find different things but the main thing is to find where your money is going and then take control.  It may be possible to have these things but in moderation, e.g. I had to have my Grass Roots magazine bi-monthly and allowed myself one sudoku booklet a month but stopped myself from going to the newsagent to browse the mags, and usually buy one or more, every time I went to town.  Tracking your spending for a month or two is also a very good way of finding out what your present spending is in all areas, e.g. food/groceries, clothes, personal care, etc.  To this you can add your utilities and other intermittent set payments and, by a process of multiplication or division, find out exactly where your money is going each year/month/fortnight/week/pay period.  Hopefully these numbers indicating your outgoings will add up to less than your income, which they should if you are living within your means at the moment, (indicated by the fact you have stopped using your credit cards).  Having these figures before you will also allow you to see where you can cut back and put money to debt reduction.  You mention your budget but I'm not sure if it is just an expression or if you have a written budget.  You should have a written budget, covering all possible outgoings including an amount for emergencies/breakdowns and replacements for household appliances and cars, (which in my budget just sat in my account and acted as an emergency fund), and a set amount to apply to debt.  Spending without a plan and no money allocated to debt means there is never enough left at the end of the pay period, (don't ask me how I know this!!).

I spent many many hours pouring over the internet and reading books on budgets, saving, frugality, etc.,  (the library is a good source), to keep me inspired.  Needless to say the Dollar Stretcher site is a mine of information on whatever subject you need guidance.  My favourite inspirational and practical advice book is Your Money Or Your Life by Joe Dominguez and another lady whose name escapes me at the moment.

Don't forget to plan and set goals, and reward yourself for achieving them.  Once you know how much you can allocate to debt reduction you can make a rough calculation on debt milestones and target dates.  I would set the first one at $1000 - paying off $1000 would be a good reason to have a reasonable priced meal out to celebrate!!  $110,000 is not a massive amount of debt to pay off you just have to distinguish between want and need and make a decision - I don't need this thing - it would be nice but I would rather put the money towards my debt - you will find the amount you have to put to debt repayment will grow.  I paid off $43,000+ in 19 months - I am single, no kids, which I know are a major expense, but only one income.  I was a bit obsessive for a while, and still go back to tracking my spending again if I feel I'm spending too much, but I just love being debt free.  You have already made major changes in your life so I am sure you can do it

Regards

Jo

Make a monthly chart of your utilities and routine expenses and faithfully write down what you paid, check no., amount and balance left, on the chart.  It will give you peace of mind if you should think that you didn't pay something, you can then check on your chart, or if there is a dispute you can use the chart to find paperwork.  After 6 months total up your charts and you will see your progress on paying down your debt, and where your money is going. You can do it on paper or a computer spreadsheet, either way.  

When you see something that you want to buy but don't need, tell yourself that you don't have the money for it, whether you do or not.  Make that a habit, a mantra even, so that you can get control of your spending. Make your needs as simple as possible; money spent on disposable items is money down the drain. If you can use something over and over, like using rags, towels, cloths, etc., instead of paper towels for wiping, cleaning and drying, you'll be putting out less money each shopping trip. Water down shampoo and conditioner; both will work better. Empty a bottle into a bowl and add 2 full bottles of water and mix it up, re-fill the bottle and put the rest in a jar for later.   Now you have 3 bottles for the price of one. If you paid $7.00 for a bottle of shampoo, you just saved yourself $4.66.

Make things: Look around your home; is there anything there that can be repurposed instead of buying new? Old clothing can be cut up and made into rugs, placemats, cleaning cloths. If you use a Swiffer, use an old wash cloth on the head instead of buying the special pads. The wash cloth can be washed and reused. Train yourself to look at everything in a different way to put to a different use.

Electrical and battery run items: Can you do the work that they do by hand instead of with powered tools? Instead of using an electric mixer, use a wire whisk or crank type egg beater.  Do you have an electric can opener?  Get a hand operated one and learn to use it. A meat grinder can be used instead of a food processor or blender. In doing the work by hand you save on electricity costs and the price of batteries.  You also cut down on the need to recycle the batteries.  Plus you get exercise at the same time by doing the work by hand. 

Hang laundry when you can. Even if you can't hang laundry outside, wash a few things and hang them on hangers in an unused room or the bathroom. 

Cook simple small meals. If you don't know how to cook - learn.  You don't have to make, or eat, gourmet meals. Simple meat, vegetable, bread type meals can be prepared quickly and easily; for instance: broiled chicken, roasted mixed vegetables, garlic bread, all done within 45 mins. or less. 

I found Dollar Stretcher when we were having a hard time financially adjusting to retirement pay. Many things I had forgotten and the tips here were a great help in refreshing what I had known, and many things I learned new.  It was people sharing their ideas that has made Dollar Stretcher a success, and eased financial problems for the readers.  The help is here, and no, your situation is not hopeless. But it will take work.  Make it a game that you are determined to win, and practice, practice, practice.  

Edey

Welcome to the boards!  You are definitely not hopeless-as previously mentioned, you are current with your bills and that is a great first step!

You've been given tons of great advice here.  I second (or third) the notion of saving a little while paying off debt; it has helped me a lot to know that I have funds to draw on when something unexpected happens.  Keeps me from grabbing the nearest credit card and starting a new charge cycle.  Plus it is a good habit to start.  If you should happen to build up a lot of savings, you can always take some and make a lump sum payment to debt.

We too are in A LOT of debt.  Lots of credit cards, a car payment and too high mortgage!  For me, it helps if I don't look at the big picture too often (I do periodically so I always know where we stand) but I pick one bill at a time to focus on and do everything I can to pay it off.  It is extremely overwhelming (and feels impossible) if I look at the total debt.  But looking at one and diverting any extra money possible to it helps me see progress.  I just pay the minimums on the others and try to not think about them too much.  It just feels much more manageable that way.  Plus, when I do have some extra money to send in-I send it right away!  Even if it's just $20.  Often the bill I'm working on has multiple payments every month (I pay bills free online through my bank).  Keeps that extra money from being eaten up in my checking account by other expenses.  (Check to make sure you won't be charged for making multiple payments first, most accounts don't do that but you never know!)

I would be very careful before doing consumer credit counseling of any kind.  Especially because you are not behind in your bills.  It will negatively impact your credit for a long time (if that's important to you-some people don't care as they don't plan to use credit again so they don't worry about their credit score too much).  Also like someone else mentioned, you can end up worse off depending on the company and what you have to agree to do to use their services.  They are not always helpful.

Please join us on the Slaying the Debt Dragon thread.  Lots of support there, and many of us are dealing with large debt totals.  Encouragement is so helpful for the times you are doing well and also when you feel yourself losing motivation.

Lastly, the only other advice I have to offer is to cut expenses as much as possible and try and increase income where possible then devote all that extra money to debt payoff.  Sell stuff on craigs list or ebay, even consider 2nd jobs, especially if they are flexible options that don't interfere with your family life too much.  DH last summer worked on call as a limo driver.  He only worked 4 or 5 times but raised an extra $500 for debt payoff.  We are always looking for extra little ways to make a little money that don't require a huge commitment (we have 2 kids & 1 on the way so working too much is not really possible for our current situation).  But an extra $20, $50 or $100 here and there really speeds our progress and is motivating.  We never include extra income as part of our regular budget; it gets deposited and paid to debt immediately, almost like we never saw it.

Best of luck!  It's not easy for sure, I have backslid several times, but I am making progress and I know I'll get there in the end.  I am working hard every day to make our situation better, for us, for our future and for our kids too.  I try to keep that at the forefront of my mind to help me combat the "wants" and frustrations and lack of motivation and pop up from time to time.

 Thank you for everyone who has responded.  Just knowing that others feel confident that we can dig out of this is a great thing.  You've given us a lot of food for thought, and we are going to think about options.  I am grateful that there was good, different advice. DH was thinking that all we could do was debt reduction through one of those places, which my gut says may not be best for us.  Having a few of you state that they may not be the best thing, helped a lot.  I'll definitely be in touch and will not be a stranger.  THANKS again!